Meandering and Musing

This is a post I keep thinking I've made, and then I keep trying to make, keep meaning to make, and then forgetting. So.

If you follow me on FB, you know part of this, but bear with me.

In mid October, I had a day where my chest hurt. I took some aspirin, and was a bit concerned, but I Had Stuff To Do. I talked to my best friend that night about it (he's a nurse) and he thought I should get it checked. I talked to a few other people, but dude. I did not want more medical bills.

The next day I felt ok. It was a Friday. Worked. Went to dinner and a movie with a friend. Toward the end of the movie, chest was weird again. Friend insisted we go to ER. (I made sure I had a book first.)

The ER doctor was sort of...he couldn't decide at first whether to admit me or not. Because I'm young. And my EKG was ok. But also EVERYONE on my father's side of the family has a history of heart disease (four of my dad's siblings died of heart disease or heart attacks, as did his mother and father. My dad died of cancer. My two remaining aunts? One has PAD, and the other just had a triple bypass.) I have high blood pressure. So, they admitted me at like, 5 in the morning. I was so tired. I spent three days at Mount Sinai.

While there, my heart stopped. Briefly. Twice. So they wanted to run tests. EKGs and all were fine. Stress test was fine. I was bored, but glad I went in. I also had an interesting roommate. Sigh.

They finally let me leave, but told me to definitely see a cardiologist.

I had a bunch of stuff happen at work. It took me about a month to call my doctor and leave a message on her referral line to tell her what happened.

And then I didn't hear anything. For a month. Now, remember, this is in November/December. This is Bitchy!Doc. So I call her finally and she asks me, through her assistant, why I would want to see a cardiologist. Um, I'm bored? I like specialists? Because my heart is stopping and the hospital doctors told me to? I was pissed. I had explained this when I had called before, and had the records sent to her. She didn't want to do the referral without doing an EKG, which the cardiologist would also do. More unnecessary testing! NO. That was my last straw with her. (I think I did write about this part.)

Fast forward to freaking MARCH. When I finally have a primary care physician (after many insurance and doctor delays) and get in to see a cardiologist. I LOVE this woman. She spent over 45 minutes with me, really talked and listened to me. But we still didn't know what was going on.

Then, in a total House, M.D., hand-on-the-doorknob (not quite) moment, I said "You know, it almost always happens when I eat." (the stopping is only 2-3 seconds.)

She looked at me, and asked if I drank while eating
"You mean alcohol?"

"No, I mean fluids."

"Oh, ..no, not usually. Almost never. Actually people comment on it."
Her reaction was immediate. "Oh. OH. OH I totally know what it is. Oh. Ok. Ok you don't need to worry. This...we can fix this."
We then talked about the nervous system, and how using one part sort of made the other part stop, and how activating your vagus nerve can slow down your heart.
Apparently your esophagus is connected to your vagus nerve. And stretching it out, by say, eating without drinking and thus keeping your throat dry, combined with stress, can cause the vagus nerve to overreact. And thus instead of slowing down my heart, it stopped it.
She said she'd seen this a few times before.
The solution?
Drink fluids while eating. Take tiny bites.
We did a few rounds of "Seriously?" over that. But yes.

I've looked into it myself, and talked to other medical professionals, and they all agree it makes sense.

Though I have to admit, after 33 years of not drinking while eating (my usual M.O. is to pour something, take a few sips, eat dinner, and then drink after I eat.) retraining has been very difficult. I must admit I'm still only at about 40%, and I've had my heart stop a few times, but it no longer scares me.

It is the best fix I've ever had to a medical problem.

NOTE: Because of my history, I usually get along very very well with medical professionals, and can name exactly two others in my entire life I did not get along with, and both of those were known to have serious bedside manner issues. Just so you know I don't have an issue with doctors. I love doctors! They saved my life!


So back in December, my beloved primary care physician closed her doors, due to financial issues (She was awesome, but as I explained to my mom, I was probably her most well-off patient and I'm freakin' broke.)

I found a new doctor, though she couldn't see me until the end of January.

The offices were very nice, new, lots of natural light. I was very impressed. Located on one of the beaches, not far from work, not far from home (though a bit farther than my awesome old doc, and I do have to pay a toll, since the beach has its own SPESHUL toll system not covered by my SunPass.)

And then she came in.

So I was reading The Emperor of All Maladies: A Biography of Cancer and before I could even put the book down and introduce myself to her, she gasps and says,

"Ohmygod, why would you want to read that? I mean, ugh!"

(Um, It's a bestseller, for one. And it is interesting...and...what business is it of yours?)

So...not getting started on the right foot.

She then asks me if I have my records from my old doctor. My old doctor had kindly provided me with a CD, which I handed over. This doctor scoffed, all "She couldn't print them OUT! GAH!" Which....aren't most files efiles now? Whatever. You have staff.

Note--she still hasn't introduced herself to me. And when that happens, she INSULTS MY NAME. Now look, I get odd reactions to my odd name, but she was all "Why would anyone name a child that? Why haven't you changed it?" Christ, lady!

So then we move on to listing my meds. And here is where part of my hesitation about blood pressure meds and THIS DOCTOR comes from. She starts going on and on about how I have too many doctors and too many meds. I have a neuro for my migraines and the nerve damage from the meningitis. I have a urologist since I have all those UTI/kidney issues. And I have an ENT I see twice a year. Oh, and a therapist. Oh, and an OB/GYN what with having the ladybits. I take birth control, allergy meds, and a migraine med daily. That's it for daily. I also have Ambien, Ativan, and flexeril as needed, which are not often. That's it, I think. I have antibiotics when I need them. But she went on a tear about how I was on too many meds and had too many doctors.

Oh, and of course I had to ask for a gastroenterologist for the tumor issue.

She also gasped in shock when she realized my previous doctor was on the (oh the horror!) mainland.

And when we got to the Ativan, she asked why. I told her I had a lot of stress. She said she couldn't imagine what I had stress from. Really? Well, I certainly didn't want to discuss my personal life, so I told her my job was stressful, because hey, anyone who reads the locked entries here knows that it is. She asked what I did, and we had the following conversation.

Me: I'm a public interest lawyer.
Doc: What? Public interest? What's that?
Me: A lawyer for the poor. My clients don't pay me, I get paid through grants and donations and stuff like that. I help disabled children, mostly.
Doc: Ohmigod (gasp of shock/disgust) *wrinkles nose* Why would you want to do that? Is that what you started out wanting to do, or could you just not get anything else? God, get a better job!!

I KID YOU NOT. THAT IS WHAT SHE FUCKING SAID.

And right after that she took my blood pressure and it was VERY HIGH. BECAUSE SHE JUST INSULTED MY CAREER.

Yes, I have issues with where I work, but it was EXACTLY why I went to law school.

I was in shock! I couldn't believe it! DID THAT JUST FUCKING HAPPEN?!??!?!?!?!

However, I knew I'd need to keep the same primary care physician til I had the colonoscopy, otherwise the insurance would be a giant asspain. God, she sucks so much.

I actually told some of my coworkers about the job-insulting bit. One of them, who is the most mild-mannered, quiet woman EVER, was yelling "GET RID OF HER" over our video conferencing equipment. I am, I just have to find a new one who will take our crappy insurance.

However, I have decided that if she won't listen to me about lisinopril over beta blockers, I will walk the fuck out. Appointment is May 16th.




(Post Script: One of my best friends here, Cat, recommended my awesome doctor who closed her practice to me. Her now ex, Dang, and Dang's entire family see Bitchy!Doc, and Dang always tried to get Cat to switch. I described Bitchy!Doc to Cat, and when I said something about the location, Cat ventured a guess as to Bitchy!Doc's true identity. I confirmed it, and Cat was like "Ohmygod, Dang LOOOOOOVES her! I knew Dang and her family had it wrong!")

So. The GIANT HOSPITAL BILL OF DOOM has been processed by my insurance company. (I know because I've still been obsessively checking it online.)

Out of the $7,617.49 that the hospital charged me (for a 4 hour emergency room visit that included a CT scan) my insurance company says I owe NOTHING.

Now, they also said I only owed half what I owe with the damn ambulance company, so one never knows.

They only paid $1,639. Which would, one might think, leave quite a balance, but they allegedly argued a bunch of discounts/negotiations/etc.

However, this was the same issue I ran into with the ambulance, where the ambulance argued they didn't have a contract with the insurance company, so they weren't bound by those. I'm really hoping that isn't the case here.

Even if it is, I still have one trick up my sleeve: Originally, they billed me for about $1920, when they had submitted the original claim to the wrong insurance company and had been denied. They've gotten $1639. They were willing to write off over $5600 in the beginning. If pressed, I'll argue and argue and offer to pay the difference between the $1920 and the $1639. And we'll see how that works.

So, its processed, but now I wait for a bill.

So that trip to the ER in March, the one where the paramedics took me off the plane, and basically put me in the ambulance? Is turning out to be one of the most expensive days of my life. Am already fighting the cost of the ambulance. Now the hospital is about 3 times what I expected, to the tune of two grand. FML.

*My foot is fine. It is no longer swollen and no longer hurts at all. It was just the edge of the tire, which I should have made more clear in my post, but I felt awful at the time--more due to this chest cold then foot pain. I spent the entire weekend asleep or near-asleep, so if you contacted me and I didn't reply, that's the reason. I did not have the foot examined or x-rayed. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, and if she feels I need it, I'll have her look at it.

*I did manage to pull a muscle in my back yesterday. At the ATM. I'm awesome. Still a tiny bit twingy today but mostly fine. Go me.

*Have Several Big Introspective Things To Say, but those get their separate posts. Am super busy and mostly good, so...YAY.

I didn't pull a disc in my neck!

Instead, I pulled my trapezius muscle and am now suffering from excruciating muscle spasms. The trapezius runs from the base of your skull down below your shoulderblade. It also intersects with your throat muscles, which is why the doctor knew what it was once I said "Oh, and every time I swallow I have shooting pain down my neck and back."

Yay something new?

Warm compresses, stretching exercises, and muscle relaxers. When it is spasming, it is horrible. I woke up at 2 am this morning in agony. chemokitty caught me crying while making a peanut butter sandwich.

Yet I am at work. I have some client meetings this morning and some other stuff to do, but I think I'm going to go home early. This is ouchy.

But I did get to make bad puns, so not a total loss.

Thanks for the good wishes.

So the good news is I'm probably not allergic to wheatgrass.


The bad news?


I have Not!Mumps.


My face started being all tender yesterday afternoon. Took a nap. Woke up at six, and had a serious case of chipmunk cheeks.

The only thing I had done differently yesterday was a shot of wheatgrass juice. I thought...maybe allergies? Took some benadryl and it knocked me out. At four am I was sooo much worse.

Go to hospital. Have been thinking "cant be mump, my cheeks are swollen, not my jaw area". While in the room with the admitting nurse, she suddenly says "Oh. Oh dear. Your face." I reach up. My cheeks are far less puffy. My jaw and neck were swollen.

The LPNs and RNs and everyone else starts murmuring "mumps". I sit in the ER, on my little bed, and everyone keeps coming by to see the girl with the mumps. An older RN tells me he's been there for thirty years, and he had never seen a case before. Great. Numerous exclamations of "who the hell gets the mumps these days?!?!" did not make me fell better. I call blitheandbonny and ask her if she's up on her shots (and I happened to be up on mine, anyway.) I'm fighting off tears. I call my mom, and just break down. I can't have the mumps. No time for that. And dammit, I hate my immune system if I end up with something no one there has seen. Hell, the guy who put in my IV asked what was wrong with my veins, and when I told him about the meningitis, he just laughed and said "your immune system isn't worth crap". Thanks, dude.

They send for an ENT. A nice older doc with the little black bag and everything.

He tells me it isn't an allergic reaction, it wouldn't be localized like that.

He tells me the only good thing I heard all day. I don't technically have the mumps. Mumps is a specific virus. They think mine is bacterial. I have parotitis, which basically means my parotid glands (salivary glands) are inflamed. They don't seem to have too much infection in them right now, but the concern is that they can get infected very easily with strep or staph when inflamed. So I have to keep the fluid moving in the glands, so in addition to drinking plenty of water, I'm suppsed to do things to make myself salivate. Milla Jovovich movies should be good. And lemon juice. I've been squirting lemon juice into my mouth. *shudder*. But it works. He also suggested hard candy. I ate jolly ranchers today on doctor's orders.

Supposedly I'll be much much better on Monday.

Not!Mumps.

Sheesh.

ETA: He did give me antibiotics.

Stomach very unhappy with me right now, and has been in such a state since early yesterday. Grr. Originally thought it was food poisoning or something, but probably not. A virus maybe.

Couldn't possibly be stress and nerves. Nope. Uh uh. No way.

*sigh*


In other news, edemynag rocks!